Get Free Tickets at the movies...

When you boil it down, all theaters have to do is project a film on the screen, and offer decent popcorn! However, in my experience, it's a rarity when they get this right. So, I've become a chronic complainer, and only occasionally have to pay for tickets. What is truly amazing -- what people like you are willing to put up with.

If you received a cold steak in a restaurant, if there was a bug in your soup, if the clothes you bought had a hole in it, if your new DVD didn't play, if there was a scratch on your new plasma TV screen, YOU WOULD COMPLAIN! But when you see a movie in the theater and... the projection light is going dim, there are gummy bears blocking the image on the screen, the sound isn't right or out of sync, the print is scratched or covered in dust, YOU NEVER COMPLAIN. Why, I have no clue, because I complain virtually every time, but I never see anyone else hanging around to speak with the manager. I never complain about the lousy, fat-laden popcorn, but I always complain when they can't display the movie on the screen in the way in which it was intended to be seen.

During this past Academy Awards show, presenters continually felt compelled to remind us to see their films in the theater. Why should we when we can see them on our home theaters without gummy bears blocking the image, without scratches running throughout? If you see a film several weeks after it was released, best of luck getting through it without seeing scratches and piles of dust (along with several splices to put the film back together). That's how I saw Good Night and Good Luck. And so, I won't be paying for the next movie I see at AMC.

DON'T PAY FOR MOVIES WHEN YOU SEE THEM LIKE THIS. This is when you go to the manager and ask for a refund, which you will receive in the form of free tickets for the next movie you see there.

Believe me, I'd rather not be collecting free tickets. I would prefer I see movies the way they were intended to be seen. I'd prefer not to be distracted by a wart on the actors' faces, which turns out to be an annoying clump of gummy bears. But, when it happens, I demand compensation. And, you should too.

Here are some of the things to complain about: during the credits, the staff are talking or they begin to clean-up around you, the house lights are turned up, the sound is turned off (at any point).. Yes, you need to stay for the credits to exercise these complaints. Scratches (usually appear as vertical lines running up and down the picture), dust (appears as specs all over), dim projection bulb (appears as a dull and grainy image, which you may think is part of the cinematography, but likely isn't), gummy bears on the screen (we do not advocate throwing your own on the screen for the purposes of garnering free tickets).

joel

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